I don't know about you, but I often find the majority of January to be the lobby where I contemplate the past and plan the future before leaving for the active existence that is the present and ongoing year. I find myself obsessing over the main parts and finer details of the previous year, sometimes to a fault that cracks down the center of the present. Obviously, this can lead to problems. If I can get past this period feeling good, I am usually in pretty good shape. There is, of course, a pragmatic way that these reflections must be ended. For instance, I must realize that, though I am at peace with the choices and actions I have made in the previous year, I must realize that throughout this year, and for the rest of my life, I will be dealing with the consequences of these choices and actions. A severed tie is a severed tie.
At the start of 2004, I could not come to terms with my actions and choices in the previous year, and this led to a near nervous breakdown and a seven-month migraine. The negatives of this are inherent in the description, but this time period also led to great things. For instance, by having to look in the mirror for seven months, I not only came to terms with the previous year, but also, my entire life up to that point. As a result of this reflection, I not only had a huge sense of victory upon the end of the migraine, but also a renewed understanding and sense of self. I generally regard 2004 as one of the best years of my life, perhaps behind only 1999 (the year I turned 18) and 1995 (the last year before I really came of age).
Well, I am happy to say that today I have stepped out of the lobby without a migraine or a lasting regret, and I am happily looking forward to the rest of the year and what the future holds.
Is anyone else as reflective as this? I know that my mind operates at a much higher rate than most people. I am not saying I am smarter than most people, I am only saying there are not many people out there who live inside of their head as much as me. Well, anyone else have a New Year ritual, or do you just keep on truckin?