Answers to the Questions
I have been interviewed by the amazing -E.
She has asked me ten questions, and here they are, along with my answers:
1) What is your fondest childhood memory?
I know this is cutting it close, but I think my fondest childhood memory occured at the age of 11, in a Pointe Coupee League soccer game. I was playing defense back near the goal, and the ball was about thirty feet away from me. Both teams were fighting over it, and somehow, everyone had gathered in a circle, and the ball was stuck. I'm serious, everytime someone kicked it, it just bounced off of someone else in the circle and stayed there, and this probably went on for over a minute. I knew the ball was in play for my position, but there were so many people there already, I figured someone would eventually do something to end the stalemate. Then, my legs starting moving. I almost wasn't controlling my own body. Suddenly, I was running full speed at everyone, they moved out of my way, and I kicked the ball about 50 yards down the field. Everyone, even the other team, and everyone in the stands erupted into applause and cheers. I think that was the moment I realized what I wanted to do with my life.
Be the guy that kicked the ball loose when it got stuck.
2) You're a superhero. What is your name. What does your costume look like? What special powers do you have?
My name El Logico. I wear a t-shirt and jeans. When people fight and hurt each other for stupid reasons, I use my special powers of slap to the back of the head, and suddenly everybody gets along.
3) What is you favorite subject to write about and why?
That's a tough one. I think my favorite thing to write about is how the ghosts of the past affect the present. Most of the fiction I write involves characters consumed with their past demons, almost to the point that these people have no present. I think I write about this because I am neurotic, and I think I left the stove on. No, really, I think I write about this because I grew up in a tiny Southern swamp village next a tiny Southern lake town, next to America's biggest river, next to Baton Rouge, next to New Orleans, basically all places that were once glorious, but now lurk only in the decay of their past splendor.
4) What is the worst date you've ever been on?
All of them! When you second guess everything you do, it tends to be hard to do anything! Honestly, though, I think the date I blogged about (the one from four years ago), had to be the worst. Not only did I tell the girl that only creepy rapists had mustaches (and her dad had a mustache), but, well-I had just moved out, and I was dirt poor. I still hadn't dropped the pride that held me back from asking my parents for help, so I had no money, therefore, I did not eat, therefore I was sick, tired, and not in very good shape. I kept saying I wasn't hungry, but my date was a smart one, and realized I was as poor as dirt. She offered to pay for my meal, but I kept lying and saying I wasn't hungry. Lying is bad. When I finally overcame my sad state, and got on a roll (this is when everything I say is gold) I slipped up with the mustache comment, and killed all my momentum.
5) What one person, living or not, has had the greatest influence on your life and how so?
I would probably say (cringing) my mother. She made me aware of a lot of problems in the world I would not of ever noticed, she read C.S. Lewis to me when I was a toddler, she encouraged my creative side, and she started me on the spiritual path that I am on today. Of course, she is also the possible cause of half of the neurosis I have, today, but, anyway...
6) If you had the ability to invent anything you wanted, what would be your first invention and why?
Duh, a time machine, silly. I wouldn't change anything, though. There are just some things I am curious about, for instance, did I really say that?, and, well, I've always wanted to see a real dinosaur. I guess that's selfish, though, so I should probably say a machine that could feed everyone in the world, though I hear we make enough food to feed everyone a few times over, but some people are eating a little more than their share. Yeah, I'm heavyhanded in my rhetoric.
7) You found some drink that makes you invisible for 24 hours. But it is the last one in the world. What do you do for 24 hours of invisibility?
First, feel really guilty about drinking the only invisibility drink in the world. Second, sulk for a few minutes. Third, spend the rest of the day playing video games.
8) What is your most embarrassing moment?
One evening, before a high school basketball game, I hurt my hand. I played anyway, and I ended up on the free-throw line at the end of the game with the whole thing on the line. I missed. During the next game, when we were down by about thirty points with two or three minutes left, I ended up at the line again. Somehow, with a wounded hand, I made my first shot.
"Nice job!" someone shouted. "You make it when it counts!." I don't know why, but I don't think I have ever been so embarrassed, or hurt, in my life.
9) Is there anything in this world, any passion of yours, that you are willing to die for? What is it?
I am glad you saved this one for almost the end, because you knew I would get really serious here.
As a Christian, I would like to think I could lay down my life for another human. I guess that life would be the passion, or to be more specific, Christ, and the example He set. I know my frequent use of the words "fuck" and "shit", as well as my leftist politics make a lot of people doubt that I'm really serious about any of this Christianity stuff, but it is actually the
most important thing in my life.
10) Tell us something that not many know about yourself. It can be goofy or serious, that part is up to you.
First, let's get the serious part out of the way. For some reason, a lot of people think I am a cynical bastard that hates everybody, but in reality, I am an extrememely light-hearted person that cries when other people get hurt, cries when he gets hurt, and cries sometimes during the middle of the day during perfectly sunny weather for no good reason.
Now the goofy: In the second grade, after declaring that all girls had cooties, I married my dog. Sadly, the marriage did not last, and we divorced. You would think this would lead to a life of happily-ever-after, but do you have any idea how hard it is for a divorcee to get a date?
She has asked me ten questions, and here they are, along with my answers:
1) What is your fondest childhood memory?
I know this is cutting it close, but I think my fondest childhood memory occured at the age of 11, in a Pointe Coupee League soccer game. I was playing defense back near the goal, and the ball was about thirty feet away from me. Both teams were fighting over it, and somehow, everyone had gathered in a circle, and the ball was stuck. I'm serious, everytime someone kicked it, it just bounced off of someone else in the circle and stayed there, and this probably went on for over a minute. I knew the ball was in play for my position, but there were so many people there already, I figured someone would eventually do something to end the stalemate. Then, my legs starting moving. I almost wasn't controlling my own body. Suddenly, I was running full speed at everyone, they moved out of my way, and I kicked the ball about 50 yards down the field. Everyone, even the other team, and everyone in the stands erupted into applause and cheers. I think that was the moment I realized what I wanted to do with my life.
Be the guy that kicked the ball loose when it got stuck.
2) You're a superhero. What is your name. What does your costume look like? What special powers do you have?
My name El Logico. I wear a t-shirt and jeans. When people fight and hurt each other for stupid reasons, I use my special powers of slap to the back of the head, and suddenly everybody gets along.
3) What is you favorite subject to write about and why?
That's a tough one. I think my favorite thing to write about is how the ghosts of the past affect the present. Most of the fiction I write involves characters consumed with their past demons, almost to the point that these people have no present. I think I write about this because I am neurotic, and I think I left the stove on. No, really, I think I write about this because I grew up in a tiny Southern swamp village next a tiny Southern lake town, next to America's biggest river, next to Baton Rouge, next to New Orleans, basically all places that were once glorious, but now lurk only in the decay of their past splendor.
4) What is the worst date you've ever been on?
All of them! When you second guess everything you do, it tends to be hard to do anything! Honestly, though, I think the date I blogged about (the one from four years ago), had to be the worst. Not only did I tell the girl that only creepy rapists had mustaches (and her dad had a mustache), but, well-I had just moved out, and I was dirt poor. I still hadn't dropped the pride that held me back from asking my parents for help, so I had no money, therefore, I did not eat, therefore I was sick, tired, and not in very good shape. I kept saying I wasn't hungry, but my date was a smart one, and realized I was as poor as dirt. She offered to pay for my meal, but I kept lying and saying I wasn't hungry. Lying is bad. When I finally overcame my sad state, and got on a roll (this is when everything I say is gold) I slipped up with the mustache comment, and killed all my momentum.
5) What one person, living or not, has had the greatest influence on your life and how so?
I would probably say (cringing) my mother. She made me aware of a lot of problems in the world I would not of ever noticed, she read C.S. Lewis to me when I was a toddler, she encouraged my creative side, and she started me on the spiritual path that I am on today. Of course, she is also the possible cause of half of the neurosis I have, today, but, anyway...
6) If you had the ability to invent anything you wanted, what would be your first invention and why?
Duh, a time machine, silly. I wouldn't change anything, though. There are just some things I am curious about, for instance, did I really say that?, and, well, I've always wanted to see a real dinosaur. I guess that's selfish, though, so I should probably say a machine that could feed everyone in the world, though I hear we make enough food to feed everyone a few times over, but some people are eating a little more than their share. Yeah, I'm heavyhanded in my rhetoric.
7) You found some drink that makes you invisible for 24 hours. But it is the last one in the world. What do you do for 24 hours of invisibility?
First, feel really guilty about drinking the only invisibility drink in the world. Second, sulk for a few minutes. Third, spend the rest of the day playing video games.
8) What is your most embarrassing moment?
One evening, before a high school basketball game, I hurt my hand. I played anyway, and I ended up on the free-throw line at the end of the game with the whole thing on the line. I missed. During the next game, when we were down by about thirty points with two or three minutes left, I ended up at the line again. Somehow, with a wounded hand, I made my first shot.
"Nice job!" someone shouted. "You make it when it counts!." I don't know why, but I don't think I have ever been so embarrassed, or hurt, in my life.
9) Is there anything in this world, any passion of yours, that you are willing to die for? What is it?
I am glad you saved this one for almost the end, because you knew I would get really serious here.
As a Christian, I would like to think I could lay down my life for another human. I guess that life would be the passion, or to be more specific, Christ, and the example He set. I know my frequent use of the words "fuck" and "shit", as well as my leftist politics make a lot of people doubt that I'm really serious about any of this Christianity stuff, but it is actually the
most important thing in my life.
10) Tell us something that not many know about yourself. It can be goofy or serious, that part is up to you.
First, let's get the serious part out of the way. For some reason, a lot of people think I am a cynical bastard that hates everybody, but in reality, I am an extrememely light-hearted person that cries when other people get hurt, cries when he gets hurt, and cries sometimes during the middle of the day during perfectly sunny weather for no good reason.
Now the goofy: In the second grade, after declaring that all girls had cooties, I married my dog. Sadly, the marriage did not last, and we divorced. You would think this would lead to a life of happily-ever-after, but do you have any idea how hard it is for a divorcee to get a date?
Comments
I know you think you're the best damn person ever, but you're a good guy. Take care of yourself.
Take care!