So Much For I

Well, that's it for "I." Ever heard of synaesthesia? Words that start with "I" seem small and mean to me for some reason. I'm not saying I have synaethesia, just that words that start with "I" make me feel funny for some reason. They seem foreboding and nasty and cold. That's weird. "J" starting words seem really inconsequential and minor to me. That's not fair, because a lot of artists I really respect start with "J." So does "jackanape," though. Do you really want your band to start with the same letter as "jackanape?" Also, "junk" starts with "j." You know, like, "That Jackanape just kicked you in the junk!"
Man, these upcoming albums I'm reviewing have everything going against them!