Tales From the Darkside (1990 Movie Review)

1990 Paramount Pictures
Directed by: John Harrison; Written by: Michael McDowell and George A. Romero
Starring: Deborah Harry, Christian Slater, David Johansen, William Hickey, James Remar, and Rae Dawn Chong
MPAA Rating: R; Running Time: 93 Minutes
The Nicsperiment Score: 6/10

A plucky young 1990 pre-teen has found himself kidnapped by a witch, chained up in her kitchen, as she prepares to cook him and get him ready to eat. He finds a book in his cell that belongs to the witch, and stalls his main-course destiny by reading her stories from it. Why doesn't she already know these stories? After all, it is her book. Oh well, anyway, what follows are three dark, yet silly tales of terror...Tales From the Darkside.
1990's Tales From the Darkside (The Movie) is a brainchild of George A. Romero and a spinoff of the famed horror director's television show of the same name. It features a frame story and three nearly 30 minute short films, one of which is written by Romero himself, two by Michael McDowell, with the whole thing being directed by the TV show's frequent writer/director, John Harrison. 
Tales From the Darkside (The Movie) is the definition of a "mixed bag," not in that some tales are better than others, but in that each tale is itself a mixed bag of near equal value to the others. The first is a modern mummy tale that is equal parts fun as dumb and frustrating. Romero's middle tale features some extremely fun gore effects and domesticated animatronic cat terror, but also plenty of dull, dimly-lit stretches. The final tale is a tragic romance that features some enjoyable creature effects, but also some dull stretches of its own. Thankfully, the cast, including Blondie as the frame story witch, is surprising and delightful, and make every tale work as well as it can.
Overall, Tales From the Darkside (The Movie) is just a little bit more fun and engaging than it is dull and silly, and worth a watch for horror anthology fans who don't mind a lighter touch, but one watch is likely enough.